The other day a female co-worker who has several children in elementary school was chatting with me about being pregnant. She made a comment about remembering how happy she was when she was pregnant. This is a down-to-earth, sensible woman who has a successful career and I wouldn't necessarily guess as being a mom.
Her comment has stuck with me. I've been surprised at how harsh I can be since I've been pregnant. If I think something unkind, I'm much more likely to say it than run it through the "Katharine-filter" which can neutralize the sharpest of criticisms.
Despite that fact, I still think I'm generally happier now that I'm pregnant than before. Despite the uncertainties of life with a baby, the physical discomfort, the overwhelming decisions,, I feel a contentedness that I can't quite explain. It's as if the world is progressing just as it should and life is falling into place. Even if all the baby stuff doesn't get purchase or I gain more pregnancy weight than I want to or I don't get as much done in a day/week/month than I wanted...it will all be OK.
When we decided try the "kid-thing," we hadn't overcome many of our reservations. We took a leap of faith, believing that in light of all the sacrifices children require we didn't understand the joy and happiness that parents profess, that there was something just *right* about having kids.
Our little boy isn't here yet, but I already feel that this was the right thing to do. The happiness in my heart confirms it.